An original way to say ' Thank you for your custom.'

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  • Our cafetiere fell to pieces as most of them seem to nowadays, so my beloved ordered a new one via Amazon and received the following somewhat amusing e mail from the company. I bet a lot of their customers give reviews.

    Message from 3rd party seller:

    Howdy Mrs :-)

    Your Ritual French Press has just completed the white glove packaging ceremony.

    Our 12 person inspection team gave their final approval,

    and our in house Tibetan monk blessed eternal happiness to its owner

    as we all waved goodbye to the mailman speedily bringing it to your doorstep.

    Countless people have been involved in the design,

    sourcing the raw materials, manufacturing, packaging,

    shipping, marketing, and support of this seat cushion.

    If it doesn't live up to your highest hopes let us know,

    and once we stop crying, we will make sure you are 100% satisfied.

    Assuming you love it, would you like to help

    someone else be just as happy?

    All you have to do is leave an honest review on You depend

    on reviews all the time to make wise decisions so be kind

    and pay it forward and help someone else be as smart as you ;-)

    When you are ready, please click on this link to leave your review.

    Until then we will just be checking our computers every 30 seconds,

    like geeky teenagers in love, desperately hoping you like us.

    As a preemptive thank you, in about 1 week

    I will send you a promo code for 10% off

    all of our other awesome products.

    Again, thank you so much for joining our customer hall of fame.

  • Was that hand written by them, Morgan?

    It's nice to be thanked, but normally when thanks come from companies they don't mean it and its just a robotic exercise like any other for them. The fact they used the word "mailman" indicates they probably copied from an American site.

    I actually don't like how more and more companies are personalising things. Companies aren't my fiends, they are just organisations I buy products and services from.

    As I said in another thread, my energy company always finishes its communications with me with the line: "Love & Power" totally bizarre. I can't stand it!

    To be honest, if I received a thank you note like that, I'd be tempted to send the product back to them with my own note saying it wasn't blessed enough, so better sack the monk, but I'm just totally evil.:evil:^^

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  • This story is perfectly true I assure you.

    Yesterday the new cafetiere arrived. Today she unpacked it and brought it in to show me. "Very nice." says I. Bamboo handle, chrome fittings, very smart. So I said to her. "Remind me every now and then to tighten the screw at the bottom up to stop it falling to bits."

    She said " Oh it's not for using. " - "Errrrrrrrr?????? I thought you said you needed a new one?" - "I do" she said but I'll use the display one." - "Display one???"

    "Well I always like a nice looking one to put on display in the kitchen and when I need a new one I buy another nice looking one and use the one I had on display for every day use."

    I might go and get counselling soon. For me, not her. I'll never be able to cure her.?(

  • Now that mass-market companies can develop an emotional rapport with a consumer by successfully fabricating personalised communication and recognition, there is no reason why such a relationship cannot be developed between a human consumer and an Artificial Intelligence seller. In fact, I'm wondering these days which is better company: a naive manipulable needy human or an Artificial Intelligence humanoid. Granted, the latter relationship stands no chance of going anywhere outside of its programmed box but, on the other hand, (1) it could be sufficient unto the day and (2) unlike with an exceedingly average human being, dashed expectations and disillusionment are entirely removed.

  • This will most certainly be the future, and judging by some of the utterly useless sales staff in the world of today (not their fault as most are no longer trained properly), a nice, smart, polite, helpful android would be a blessing.

    The vagabond who's rapping at your door

    Is standing in the clothes that you once wore

  • Solution: Instant coffee and/or tea bags.

    Problem solved!:P

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